Funny Quotations On Marriage For Anchoring

Here is the best collection of some funny, humorous and eye opening Quotes for Married ones. All the bachelors will definietly appriciate and have fun with these Quotes. These Quotes can be used in Mahila Sangeet Function where you are planning to anchor the whole event.

A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband
leaned over, made a wish
and threw in a penny.
The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned
over too much, fell
into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned
for a while but then
smiled ” It really works ! “



A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
parted mother and started back toward his car when his attention was
diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be
praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, ‘Why did u have to
die? Why did you have to die?” The first man approached him and said, “Sir,
I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this
demonstration of pain in is
more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so? Deeply? A
child? A parent?”The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then
replied “My wife’s first husband.”



If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in first?
The Dog of course… at least he’ll shut up after u
let him in!
Anonymous




Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
to get to married.
He says “the wedding rings look like minature
handcuffs…..”

Anonymous




She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, “Am I too
late for the garbage?”
Following her down the street I yelled, “No, jump in.”

Anonymous




She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then
the mud fell off.

Anonymous




My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
That was only for the estimate.

Anonymous



I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our
anniversary?” She said,”Somewhere I have never been!” I told her,
“How about the kitchen?”

Anonymous


I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding
her way back to home always.

Anonymous


When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of
one thing: either the car is new or the wife.

Anonymous


Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

Anonymous


When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.

Anonymous


Marriage is a three-ring circus:
Engagement ring
Wedding ring
Suffering

Anonymous


Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only Thing in life!!

Anonymous


Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.
Oscar Wilde



Don’t marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
Scottish Proverb




I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
Sam Kinison



A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.
Anonymous



Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn’t, they’d be married too.
H. L. Mencken



Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.
H. L. Mencken



A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle
Anonymous